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Temper Your Expectations“When I was your age, I had to walk three miles to school every day – rain, snow, or shine!” Why do parents strive to impress sons and daughters with their own childhood difficulties? Why do men and women in leadership often respond to complaints with “war stories” about their own hard knocks? High expectations are a natural hindrance to gratefulness. A student who expects a comfortable ride to school every day as something basic and deserved ceases to be grateful for it. Many parents, corporate leaders, teachers, and others in authority seek to provide improvements that they did not enjoy in their earlier years. Yet they are amazed when these provisions are received with disappointment, ingratitude, and even criticism. This unfortunate reality suggests a need for careful self-examination – a regular review of one’s own expectations and gratefulness. When we have everything we need and more, we ought to be increasingly grateful. If we instead become more demanding, this indicates we have set our expectations – our sense of what we need and deserve – too high. How much do you really need? How much do you really deserve?
The answer to
those questions will reveal our level of expectation. Everything
surpassing the level of expectation will evoke a sense of gratitude. Men like Andrew Carnegie develop a natural sense of gratitude because, having risen from poverty, they realize how little they actually need to live and enjoy life. It is true that those in dire straits can set unrealistic expectations – and the wealthy can gratefully acknowledge how little they deserve – because finances have little to do with one’s heart attitude. Finances simply reveal a grateful or demanding spirit within a person, and the same grateful or demanding spirit will also reveal itself in personal relationships and other spheres of life. Keep your expectations in check in order to foster a true spirit of gratefulness. Assess on the Job There is a difference between lowering you expectations and lowering your standards… · Your expectations define the level of provision that you believe you deserve – that which is your right. · Your standards define the level of excellence that you believe you must uphold – that which is right. In your personal character and in the quality of your work, hold yourself to high standards. Insist on the best from yourself and from those who work for you. However, weigh your personal expectations often to ensure they are appropriate. Seek to be content with what you truly need, and receive and “extra” with a spirit of gratefulness.
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